The Truth about Abusive Relationships - Sadhguru

 

The truth about Abusive Relationships - Sadhguru 



Introduction

When you're in an abusive relationship, it's easy to feel isolated and confused. It may seem like the abuse is your fault, or that no one can understand what you're going through. But the truth is that you are not alone: many people experience abuse in their relationships, and they often don't know how to escape it. However, if you want to get out of an abusive relationship and start over with someone who respects and cares for you as a person rather than just as possession or conquest, it's important to learn how to recognize the warning signs of an abusive relationship so that you can make informed decisions about your future partners (or friends).

Victims rarely stop to analyze the abuser's behavior, because they're so busy coping with the problem. Fear of being judged forces many of these victims to keep the abuse a secret--either from outsiders or even from themselves.

Victims rarely stop to analyze the abuser's behavior, because they're so busy coping with the problem. Fear of being judged forces many of these victims to keep the abuse a secret--either from outsiders or even from themselves.

"Fear is simply because you are not living with life, you are living in your mind," says Sadhguru.

“If you resist change, you resist life.” - Sadghuru

It’s important to remember that change is not only inevitable, but necessary. Change is one of the only things we can count on in life. In fact, when something changes in your life—even if it’s not good for you—it’s good for you because it means that change has happened. If you resist this change, then all kinds of bad things will happen to you: stress, anxiety, and anger come from resisting a situation in which there is no choice but to accept something else instead (that thing being “change”).

In order to avoid these negative consequences of resisting change, you should do everything within your power to flee the situation before someone else forces them upon us with their own agenda or agenda-less actions (i.e., accident).

The signs of an abusive relationship can vary, as there may be more than one perpetrator involved, or the same perpetrator may adopt different tactics at different times to achieve their objectives.

The signs of an abusive relationship can vary, as there may be more than one perpetrator involved, or the same perpetrator may adopt different tactics at different times to achieve their objectives.

Some of the signs of abuse include:

  • isolating the victim from family and friends;

  • putting down or humiliating the victim;

  • making threats towards you (and others); and

  • controlling who you can spend time with.

The most common forms of abuse are physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse and financial or material abuse.

The most common forms of abuse are physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse and financial or material abuse.

Physical abuse is the deliberate use of force against another person in a way that causes injury or pain. It can include hitting, slapping, punching, kicking and burning.

Physical violence may not be the only form of physical abuse in an intimate relationship - it can also involve restraining the victim so they cannot move freely (for example through pinning them down on their bed), preventing them from leaving home or refusing to let them eat.

Abuses in a relationship can also stem from insecurity and jealousy on the part of the abuser(s).

Abuses can also stem from insecurity and jealousy on the part of the abuser(s). When someone is insecure, they may have a need to control their partner’s behavior or activities. For example, if your partner gets angry because you spend time with your friends, this is an abuse. Or if your partner gets jealous when you talk to another person at a party, this is also an abuse.

Fundamentally, all relationships in your life have come up because you have certain needs to fulfill – physical, mental, emotional, social, financial and so on. You try to establish a certain type of relationship to fulfill whatever kind of need you have. If that need is not fulfilled, that relationship cannot be.

As a relationship develops, there are various needs that have to be fulfilled. Every relationship is not just about physical needs and sexual fulfillment. It is also about mental, emotional and social needs being fulfilled.

Fundamentally, all relationships in your life have come up because you have certain needs to fulfill – physical, mental, emotional, social, financial and so on. You try to establish a certain type of relationship to fulfill whatever kind of need you have. If that need is not fulfilled, that relationship cannot be.

You will see many people who are married but they are not happy with their marriages because they don’t feel fulfilled in any other way except sexually or physically."

Conclusion

So, if you feel like something is not right in your relationship, first of all be very brave and take action for yourself. The worst thing that could happen is that nothing changes and you’re back where you started. But if things do change, it can be a very liberating experience. Remember: no one deserves to suffer abuse! If someone is abusing you or someone else in any way, get help as soon as possible.

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